Karaoke Wish List: July 2007

A little early, but it's been a good month:

1) R. Kelly and Usher, "Same Girl"
A 2007 update of Michael and Macca's "The Girl Is Mine," only with more Waffle House and superstation references. Double Up may be the first two-star album in memory to feature at least three four-star songs. Whatever that means.

2) Battles - "Atlas"
The length (7:07) makes this a highly improbable karaoke-hall option, but the nonsese lyrics can be interpreted nearly a dozen different ways: Is it "weeza wuzzza needa fuzza head-on forever"? "Bees a buzzin, she's a fuzzy, gremlins in the blender"? With the right group, this could make for a few spirited "Row, Row, Row Your Boat"-style rounds.

3) Amerie - "Crazy Wonderful"
A 31-year-old man really can't get away with singing any of the new Amerie songs, especially not this one, which is half-diary entry, half-mash note. Seriously, what is up Rick Rubin's ohm-chanting ass? Why won't put this album out?

4) The Darkness - "Friday Night"
I was shocked to even find a proper clip for this 2003 tune, as I had no idea it was ever even released as a single; "Friday" is essentially a pub-rock song with a guitar solo approrpriated from Brian May, and it's required listening for anyone who thinks the Darkness was a one-note joke (they had at least two jokes, maybe even three). When Rod Stewart is brought out of age-defying hydro-carbon tanks in 2037, this will be the first song he tackles for The Songbook, Vol, 24: Let Me Ruin A Few More Tunes For Ya.

5) Kelly Clarkson - "One Minute"
At this point, I've lost track of whether I'm supposed to be anti-Clive-pro-Kelly-and-therefore-pro-America anymore, or whether I'm supposed to be pro-Clive-pro-contrarian-pro-capitalism. Whatever. Either way, this sounds briefly sounds like a Euro-pop Sheena Easton, which is good enough for me.

Who's Your Grinder, Man?

Yes, that's Nick Cave. And yes, that monitor is feeding the lyrics to Destiny's Child's "Bootylicious":

It was a karaoke evening unlike any other. Some of the best known names in rock and pop sang their hearts out to raise £385,000 for [last night] charity at Ronnie Scott's jazz club.

Guests, among them Kate Moss, David Walliams and Elle Macpherson, were invited to bid to hear their favourite singer belt out the classic of their choice...

£30,000 was bid to hear former Pogue Shane McGowan perform what was described as "a somewhat unique interpretation" of Billy Joel's We Didn't Start The Fire. Second highest bid was for Nick Cave's version of Destiny's Child's Bootylicious, which went for £70,000.

More info—plus pictures of Elton John looking a bit like a fright-wigged Mr. Magoo—can be found here:

DAILY MAIL: Sir Elton is king of karaoke at £385,000 celebrity sing-song

We Carry On

My friend Maura found this archive of Manila-produced karaoke videos on YouTube: It features more than 150 songs, most of which contain stock imagery and low-fi keyboard arrangements (as a result, a lot of the vocal lines sound like pan flutes). The biggest surprise is that these seem to have been produced recently, as there are clips from such artists as Corrine Bailey Rae, Ne-Yo and Paris Hilton; considering how few companies even bother to include footage in their karaoke videos nowadays, the inclusion of so many recent tracks qualifies this as a mini-goldmine.

The highlight of the whole batch is this take on My Chemical Romance's "Welcome To The Black Parade," which pairs the song brooding lyrics with shots of floating swans, surfers and a fashion-show catwalk. I honestly can't tell if this is intended to be ironic—in fact, I hope it's not, as that would take away some of the charm:

YOUTUBE: KARAOKE - My Chemical Romance - Welcome To The Black Parade

Move Around Like Your Shoes Don't Fit

Not the same thing as playing with the band, but still. I'm calling dibs on "Direct Hit."

MySpace: Art Brut

Karaoke Wish List: June 2007

It's been a long time since we rock and rolled. Apologies.

1) Rihanna, "Umbrella" It would take a monumental event—plague of frogs, month-long power shortage, Chinese Democracy—for this not to be the song of the summer; I can't remember the last time I went for a walk and didn't hear "'ella, 'ella, 'ella" echoing off the street like a car alarm. For the next three months, there will be ironic covers, sincere covers—hope among hopes—a Prince cover, as that fuzzy dirge that kicks in halfway through is begging for a glyph-guitar solo.

2) Art Brut, "Direct Hit" A Sunday-morning hangover anecdote with a particularly well-executed "woo-oooh-hooo."

2) Avail, "Simple Song" New Wave, the forthcoming album from Florida punkers Against Me!, is my favorite record of the year so far; part of the reason why is that it reminds me so much of Avail, a hardcore band that I worshiped in the early to mid-'90s. I've said this before, but when will some karaoke company realize the nostalgia potential for songs like these?

4) Fall Out Boy, "I've Got All This Ringing In My Ears (And None On My Fingers) If records are to be treated as living, breathing objects—a belief held by many music nerds—than Fall Out Boy's Infinity On High was produced within an inch of its life; there are times when there's so much compression on the guitars, it actually hurts my ears. But it's packed with a half-dozen great tracks, all of which are yet to be officially released as singles. "Ringing" starts out as a Chicago*-style white-boy snap-along before dropping a truly stellar chrous. It must be fun to sing, because it's certainly great to play on guitar.

5) Franz Ferdinand, "All My Friends" (LCD Soundsystem cover) The best New Order song since "Regret."


* the band